Them

It's been quite a long run for me. I've been running and running as if I'm being chased by someone. I've been running, not knowing where direction I head to... All I know is that I needed to be somewhere... somewhere I would feel secured and loved. I needed to run away from all of them... the ones who hurt me... the ones who broke my heart... the ones who did these to me... Why did you ever have to come in my life? I thought you'll gonna make me feel better and make me feel loved... but what did you do? All of you just crushed my heart and now, it's all bruised... I don't understand why every time I turn my back from all of you and I started to make my way through my life alone, I'll just see you at the crossroad... then you'll bother about me again and here goes the history repeating itself... I'm already tired of running... Sometimes I just want to disappear and be born again with a different name, with a different identity, with a different me... I dunno if I'm gonna last like this forever... I'm growing tired of trying and trying.... of loving and hurting.... I just want to be numb from all the pain you've all caused me.... I just want to be happy but that happiness seems to be of out my reach yet... It's even far beyond my imagination... If you are one of them, do you know what I am talking about? Do you feel the pain you've inflicted on me? Do you know how much it affects me? Do you realize what you've done? Are you really that insensitive? I dunno if ever you're gonna read all of these but I hope someday you'll realize my true worth in your lives and how much you've really lost when all of you left me behind...

The last time

It's been a week already when I made that difficult decision... I am letting go of him. It's better this way, I thought. It gave me immense pain as I've expected. I tried forgetting him and find it hard to survive each day as I lessen my communications with him. I cried each night and I wanted to be in his arms even if he's somewhere far... I love him but I've got no place in his life now. I wanted both of us to be happy but I just can't go on with our setup

When was the last time we were together? I think it's two months ago... and I miss him that badly. If I had just known that it would be last time I would be with him... I would have hugged him much tighter... I would have kissed him longer... I would have savored every minute that I've been with him the last time...

Am I regretting? Yes, I am. I'm hurting so much. My heart's been bruised but doesn't he even know? I don't think so... I am just a someone in his life and I am nothing for him... As much as I want to think that he loves me too, I can't accept the fact that I just waited for nothing. All these months, I waited for the day that I would be happy with him but now, that happiness is lost already. It already ended and I was the one who ended it for good...I just wish that he's fine out there and he's happy.

Hey, please don't worry about me, I am fine... Go on with your life without me... Take care of yourself and be happy. That's all you can do for me now. I love you, goodbye...

The leaf, the tree and the wind

One busy day, I've got this text message which really caught my attention. It says:

Who should be blamed when a leaf fell from a tree? Is it the wind that blew it away? or the tree that let it go? or is it the leaf who grew tired of holding on?

You cannot blame the wind for blowing... and the leaf tried its best to hold on despite the wind is blowing it hard... I think the tree is the one responsible for the falling leaf. Why? If that tree has given enough nutrients to the leaf, the leaf will be much stronger and it will be able to survive the wind even the wild storm... If that tree has been strong enough to support the leaf, the leaf has not fallen... and the leaf might have been holding on to the tree until now...

It's funny how this simple text message can relate to what's happening in my life now. Sometimes, love just aint enough... No matter how much you try stay in the relationship, with your partner... if your partner won't help you to work it out, it's useless. You would just find yourself starting to let go of him... The pain is too much that no matter how much you want to still hold on, the wind is blowing too hard and you're falling apart... and that tree won't do anything to support and help you... then you would prefer to let go of him even if you love him too much because the pain hurts like hell...

All this time

All this time
I know some day you'll need to find
Something that you left behind
Something I can't give you
All these tears
And like a light love disappears
But hearts are good for souvenirs
And memories are forever
All this time
All in all I've no regrets
The sun still shines the sun still sets
The heart forgives the heart forgets
But what will I do now with all this time

One more kiss
Even though it's come to this
I'll close my eyes and make a wish
Hoping you'll remember

All this time
All in all I've no regrets
The sun still shines the sun still sets
And the heart forgives, the heart forgets
But what will I do now with all this time

Say goodbye
Apart we'll make another try
But don't be sorry if you cry
I'll be crying too
On this day

All this time

All this time
All in all I've no regrets
The sun still shines the sun still sets
And the heart forgives, the heart forgets
But what will I do now with all this time
What will I do now with all this time

Starting over again

And, when I hold you in my arms I promise you
You're gonna feel a love that's beautiful and new
This time I'll love you even better
Than I ever did before
And you'll be in my heart forever more

We, we're just too young to know
We fell in love and let it go
So easy to say the words goodbye
So hard to let the feeling die

I know how much I need you now
The time is turning back somehow
As soon as our hearts and souls unite
I know for sure we'll get the feeling right

CHORUS
And now we're starting over again
It's not the easiest thing to do
I'm feeling inside again
"Cause everytime I look at you
I know we're starting over again
This time we'll love all the pain away
Welcome home my lover and friend
We are starting over, over again

If we never lived alone
Then we might have never known
All of the time we spent apart
All we did was break each other's hearts

MUSIC TURNAROUND

And when I hold you in my arms I promise you
You're gonna feel a love that's beautiful and new
This time I'll love you even better
Than I ever did before
And you'll be in my heart forevermore

REPEAT CHORUS

And now we're starting over again
This time we'll chase all the rain away
Welcome home my lover and friend
We are starting over, over again
We are starting over, over again

Even if

Even if the sun refused to shine
Even if we lived in different times
Even if the ocean left the sea
There would still be you and me

Ever since the start of time
You've had my love (oh yeah)
Even before i knew your name
I knew your heart (oh girl)
In the dark of the darkest night
I can see your face (oh yeah)
I always knew from the very start
I would find a way

Chorus:
Even if the sun refused to shine
Even if we lived in different times
Even if the ocean left the sea
There would still be you and me
Even if the world will disappear
Even if the clouds will shed no tears
Even if tonight was just a dream
There would still be you and me

You've always been and you're always will be
The only one (oh yeah)
Until forever the only girl (until forever)
I'll never lie (ohh..)
In the cold of a winter's chill
I'll be here to live a part
Oh girl, giving all you need for all time
No matter what

Chorus:

Two hearts that belong together
From the very start
One love, now and forever
Nothing can tear us apart

Chorus 2x

Parting Time

I remember the days
When you're here with me
Those laughter and tears
We shared for years
Mem'ries that we had
For so long it's me and you
Now you're gone away
You left me all alone

Go on, do what you want
But please don't leave me
You'll break my heart
Hey, what should I do
Babe, I'm missin' you
Please don't disappear
These are the words that you should hear
Time and time again
I wish that you were here

I don't wanna lose you girl
I need you back to me
I don't wanna lose you
Baby can't you see
Oh, I need you
You've been a part of me

I wish someday you'll be back home
'Cause I really miss you
Darling, please come home

I wish someday you'll be back home
'Cause I really miss you
Darling, please come home